God Moments

God knows what we need and when we need it, even if we don’t! Have you ever trusted anyone enough to have a meltdown with them? This requires a huge amount of trust, this I know.

Last Friday at about lunch time I started to feel on the edge. I have increased my hours at work recently and we have a new dog in the house to look after. This has turned my usual relaxed day into a very busy, no down-time day. I started working afternoons in early February so I’ve been at this busy schedule since then. My body and mind are having a great time trying to catch up to a new normal. After lunch on Friday, I returned to work after taking the dog for a walk and knew that I was walking a tight rope. I had a headache and just wanted to get through the afternoon (2 hrs) so I could zonk out at home  and relax for the weekend. I did make it through the afternoon and collapsed on the couch a few hours later.

Unfortunately, this was just the beginning of a meltdown. The rest hit me Sunday morning at church. I was sitting in the service trying to listen but I was on sensory overload. Every sound was magnified and I felt like I wanted to run for the hills. I was a little bit scared. I prayed that God would just sustain me through the service until I could make a great escape to the other end of the building where it was quiet and I could pull myself together. (Preferably with no witnesses)  He did sustain me and I bee-lined it for the office area. I was walking around trying to find quiet while my husband stacked chairs and, lo and behold, who comes around the corner but one of my LTG partners. Uh oh! She saw me and asked if I was doing okay. I shook my head no and made my way to the couches. She asked the golden question, something to the effect of, “Would you like me to stay?” AGH!!! And watch me lose it? I told her she was welcome to stay if she wanted, so she followed me to the couch.

The choice ahead of me was, “Do I get real and vulnerable or do I brush her off and say I’ll be fine.” I didn’t want someone else to witness my fragile state of mind, (the pride thing) but at the same time I figured God put her there for “such a time as this.” I chose to trust that it would be okay and it was. She was able to minister to me and listen and just be there. A friend in time of need. She told me after I pulled out of my funk that she never walks down that hallway. She felt God telling her, “I need you to do this for me.” She obeyed and I was blessed and it was a God thing.

Do you have someone in your life you can do the tough stuff with? If you don’t, I recommend getting an LTG partner or joining another group of two. Without this kind of support, life seems much more difficult and lonely. God knows we need help to get through life. He’s given us a church family for “such a time as this.” (Whatever that time looks like) It’s comforting to know I don’t always have to be on top of my game. I am loved regardless.

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